Dark Delaqroux vs. The World (of Education)

Delaqroux Inc Updates
So how am i coping with school? Well, i can say that unfortunately, it has been similar to that shitty "Reality Bites" graph shown to my cohorts during our back from overseas orientation. The graph shows that you start out high on the Y axis, having high hopes and expectations from your experience overseas; and as time progresses on the X axis by a wee bit; your hopes and expectations will be shot down upon realizing the reality of the teaching world (paperworks, students being not profficient enough for your activities, etc.). But as more time progresses, your Y axis goes up by a lil bit coz you've start adjusting and adapting yourself more and more to the school.

And here's one thing i would like to say;
"Fuck you, graph"

Yeah, that was appropriate. My life in teaching did started out much alike that graph. But, the rationale of it is NOTHING like in the graph. As a matter of fact, i think that graph thing and the whole reality bites crap; they're shit and they fuck you in the ear. So here's the story.

I started out with high expectations and hopes. But indeed, the students' proficiency level was very very low and the kids dont listen to you. I'm teaching lower classes and if there's one thing that i learned is the difference between kids in upper classes and lower classes; it's their attention span. You come in class, they hear you speak in English, they give up, they make noise. They dont try to understand you. They simply just give up without even trying.

This was when i start thinking that maybe reality does bite. Maybe all those awesome things you learn while you're overseas cant be applied to your class. Maybe it's theory versus reality and reality is winning? I mean, how do you teach using English songs if the kids never bother listening to any English songs? How do you use videos if the school dont have a projector or a multimedia room? How do conduct an only English classroom if the only thing the kids do is laugh at your every word?

This was when my Y axis line dropped. My expectations were shot down definitely - no question. And, asking and observing how the other teachers work at school; i found out that their teaching method is; exercises, ask kids to copy down, discuss (but normally you're the only giving the answers) and repeat. It's not the most ideal teaching method, but it keeps you sane. You dont get burnt out or disappointed. You play safe and its the easiest n safest. It keeps your Y axis line go up by a lil bit - the adjusting and adapting phase. So I did the same thing.

Now the question; did my Y axis scale went up at all?

I thought that it would. But it didnt. I hated my classes. Not my students but i hate the ME in front of my class. And in two weeks time, i blew off my lid with the students. I yelled at them for being disrespectful and playing around in my class. But honestly, i was pissed with the whole situation. I am not happy with my teaching; what i am teaching and how am i teaching.

But a week after, i brought my laptop in class and showed them a video of Sleepyhead. i asked them to tell me how many items in that video they can see and say them in English. I got a zero. But the most awesome thing is, the kids were paying attention to me for the very first time. They want to know all those things in the video in English so they can say them. I went out of the class happy for the first time. On the next lesson, i brought in my laptop again with the Preposition song, and played it in the worst class i ever had. At the end of the class, they made fun of the video for being annoying and kiddy. I agreed. I laughed WITH the class for the first time. Did the lesson actually worked then? Yeah, they completed the worksheet i gave them nonetheless and they can explain to me what all those prepositions are. Happiest. Class. Ever. Also, i thought the kids are not ready for the bigger world. But i took the risk and brought in KONY2012 video. My class was all fired up. They loved the video and they were asking how they can take part in big things like that. I said "just pay attention to my class".

So my question after all of this was; why the hell did i not conduct these kind of lessons earlier? Why didnt i bring my laptop sooner? Why did i fret about the school not having a projector or the multimedia room? Why did i let the kids low profficiency level stopped me from being awesome in class? And most importantly, WHY DID I LET THAT STUPID REALITY BITES GRAPH DETERMINE WHAT SHOULD I FEEL IN MY CLASSES?

Here's the morale of the story. Yes, reality may bite you when you first step in school. You'll get paperworks, you'll get shitty working hours, your kids profficiency is at rock bottom, and you may end up sleeping on the floor for three weeks- but reality bites you only if you let it. Do not let your expectation or hopes die off and you resort to mediocre teaching methods. That mediocrity doesnt keep you sane. Your Y axis isnt going up a wee bit coz you're 'adjusting' or 'adapting'. You are being pacified from being awesome. So here's my word for new teachers. I know i'm just a teacher by a month old but please, go out there with guns blazing. You might get disappointed, yes, but bring better guns the next time. The kids will notice that. Dont EVER let your Y axis line drop and you'll find out that despite being tired and a lil burnt out from all your lessons; at least you're happy.

Delaqroux Out.

Dark Delaqroux vs. the World

Delaqroux Inc Updates!
Can you believe that? Just when i was about to start updating my blog again, i got posted for my teaching in Johor and i got so caught up with.. uh... stuffs (that's definitely not bowling, renting a house, shopping for furnitures, karaoke-ing, Kenny Rogers, Pizza Hut, Jusco etc) that i totally forgot about updating my blog. But here i am at a little Indian-Muslim shop called Thoufeeq that has ze free wifi and i'm blogging up a storm again (hopefully). So lemme tell you what has happened so far.

On the first few days of posting, things were shitty. Like seriously. I cant find a house around my school and I was never too keen to be renting a room (yeah, ego issues). Why no want rent room? Well, let's just say, i've spent three years of my life squatting in Room E of IPBA dormitory with at least 3 to 4 more people and, after experience a year in sydney with a room i can call my own, i just want to feel a sort of a progression in my life; i'm no longer studying. I'm working. I want a house on my own.

But yeah, finding a house turned out to be harder when you dont have a car and you refuse to stay somewhere too near to the school. Thing is, my school is listed under "luar bandar" and i want to stay "dalam bandar" so there again, my ego. So things went a lil lucky that i had this chanced encounter with a fellow teacher that lives in the town-ish area and had his school someplace near mine. So, not being able to find a house and not having a car, i resorted to crash in with him... for 3 weeks.

As much as I am thankful, it was shitty. I came home to an empty room that i cant call my own and as i still have this twisted intention to get a place on my own, i refuse to buy any furnitures for that room. After all, i'm just "tumpang-ing". I want my own room. I want my own house. But there I was, sleeping on my sleeping bag with my clothing bag as my pillow for three weeks. Oh, and did i mention that the floor was one of that cement floor that, no matter how many times i moped it, it seems to stay cement-y dusty? How did i manage to stay sane? Well, Foster the People. I put that shit on replay and for some reason, i just felt better.

So what happened after three weeks? Well, i finally got a place of my own. It was this one family that happened to have decided to stay at this one place for years to come but circumstance has it that they had to move away. So yeah, i got their house for rm350 a month. It's a flat unit nonetheless but the flat building is still spanking new that it doesnt look bad at all. But at least, my ego was pleased. And i was only left with a cushion set. The house wasnt furnitured. But trust me; when your back was on the cold, hard floor for 3 weeks, being able to sleep on the cushion was heaven.

More of the story to come :)